Love

4th Sunday in advent- Love
As we begin the 4th week of advent, I have so many things running through my mind. I've been writing this post in my head all week, but now can't remember everything I wanted to say. So, here is my rambling snipets... thoughts and stories of love from the past month.

I've noticed so many posts on facebook about dealing with loss during the holidays. I suppose they were always there and before I used to scroll by them because they didn't pertain to me. Now I read them all. People told me things to expect. I didn't understand them. Now I do. I thought I'd dealt with loss before. I have. But, nothing compared to this. I want to go to all the people I remember who experienced this loss and say I'm sorry I didn't understand the pain you were going through. Maybe I would have done something more?
A friend told me I would start thinking differently- that I would think "before dad died" and "after dad died". It's true. I do. I didn't even realize I was doing it at first. This is the first Christmas "after dad died". Yep. I can keep trying but it's not getting any easier to think about.
I am incredibly sad. I don't mean incredible as "a whole lot". I mean incredible as "I never would believe it". I didn't cry much at the visitation or the funeral. But, I looked at my almost empty gas gauge and could hardly breathe. When I was in Joliet on the weekends, my dad took great joy in sharing his 6 cent discount for gas when I needed gas while visiting. It's odd how things I would think would upset me don't and other things that seem so little have me bawling.
What does all of this rambling have to do with the 4th Sunday of advent? Well, I have a few ideas. The first is that if I had a choice, would I choose to go through this pain if I could grow up with such love? Absolutely! That thought has gotten me through a few times in the last couple of weeks. I'm grateful for the love my dad had for me and the love I had for my dad. I know he knew I loved him. There was never a doubt. To those of you who are angry, have lost relationships with parents, family, or friends, will you be so lucky? Sometimes, things happen and we don't expect to lose them suddenly. We think someday we will work it out. Maybe. But, maybe you won't have that opportunity. I couldn't imagine going through this pain and adding to it the guilt of not having had those important conversations. So, reach out and connect with family and friends who you need to forgive or to ask for forgiveness.
Next, if you're reading this, I'm probably talking about you. I don't always show it right now. Some days, it's hard to express, hard to even communicate. But, I feel the love. In fact, I don't know what I would do without it. It's been so amazing to feel so much love around me. It's an odd feeling to be both overwhelmingly sad and overwhelmingly loved. But, that's the best way to describe life right now. Some have sent a card, flowers, some random token as an expression of love. Some have called and we've talked, while some have called and I haven't been able to talk. I'm sorry and don't mean to ignore anyone. Kind words and promises of prayers mean so much. Today, at church someone came up to me with condolences and said my dad was the first person he met when he came to the church and what a good man he was. I loved hearing that.
One thing I have learned through this is that it's best just to do things. If someone asks, I'm going to say I'm ok. I'm not. If someone asks what I need, I need nothing. If someone shows up and has dinner or cookies, I'll eat them and be grateful not to have to think about what to do. I will read every word of every card or message I get, and I will appreciate whatever ways people reach out. So, if I haven't told you, thank you!
From now on, my goal is to just do whatever I think might be helpful or comforting to someone struggling.
I can't write about love right now without talking about my parents love. They were married for 47 years. I don't remember growing up and hearing them ever fight. Seriously! They didn't even argue. Growing up my dad worked and was gone all day and my mom worked some while we were in school. But, mom always cooked unless my dad grilled outside. They took care of each other. In the last few years, they have both had their share of health issues and have continued to take care of each other. In the last couple of years, my mom has been showing more and more signs of Alzheimers. As she has progressed, she depended more and more on my dad. She followed his lead on things, needed him to take care of things like meals, and depended on him being with her all of the time. He gave her a sense of security. My dad did everything he was able to do to take care of her.
In the last few weeks of his life, my dad was very concerned about my mom. In fact, I'm sure my dad stayed as long as he could because he didn't want to leave my mom. He was upset that he was leaving her when she needed to be taken care of. My mom spent the last few weeks of his life spending the days with him and leaving to go home at night until he came home. Once my dad came home, it was easier for them to be together. She told visitors that he was getting better. She had no idea how serious things were even though she heard the doctors tell us the reports. The thought of my dad soon not being here never occurred to her.
My mom spent her time in her recliner while my dad laid in a hospital bed set up where his recliner had been. The evening my dad died, my mom was on the couch next to his bed instead of her recliner. She never sits on the couch. She didn't say anything, just sat there, closer to him. His breathing changed and I knew the end was near. Then, my sister and I looked at each other and I got up to check, afraid of the answer I would get. My dad was gone and I lost it. My mom was confused and I vaguely heard my sister telling her. Then, the three of us were together, huddled around my dad. My mom kept repeating "I love you so". Then, as the three of us stood there, I realized my mom was there, like really there. She was comforting us as she was grieving, herself. She was being my mom. She knew what was happening and who we were. I feel like for that brief time, her love for my dad and her love for us overcame her disease. Maybe it was a gift from God, or from my dad. I don't know, but I needed it.
Now, we have to regularly remind my mom that he has passed. When she's out in familiar places, like church, where she's used to him being with her, she looks for him. When we tell her dad isn't there and that he passed, she always says "oh yeah, now I remember". After 47 years of being together, I don't think she will ever get used to him not being with her.
Next thought. I'm not alone. I've never been alone. I've always had a friend, a playmate, someone to look up to and have fun with. I have a big sister. I don't know what I'd do without her! A few months ago, I changed her ringtone to the "Sisters" song from White Christmas. When my phone rings, I hear "Sisters. Sisters. There were never such devoted sisters." At the time, it was amusing. In the last month, I've realized even more how true this is. This has been a crazy time. But, through everything, my sister and I have been working together. There were things that needed to be done and we just did them. We didn't even talk about it, we just both stepped up to do what we could. We agreed on what my parents needed and thankfully we were able to do it. In a crazy, stressful time, I'm so grateful to have my sister by my side. As we continue to care for my mom, I'm so grateful for her. I know I can always talk to her and that she will understand. Sisterly love is helping me get through this time.
We aren't decorating for Christmas. Tonight I bought my first Christmas things this season. Christmas isn't going to be like any other Christmas has been. But one of the things I read today struck me. We can have the most beautiful decorations, the best gifts, and the most picture perfect celebration, but if you don't have Christ in Christmas, then you don't have Christmas. I don't have beautiful decorations, the best gifts, or plans for the perfect celebration. But, I do have Christ this Christmas. I am grateful even more this Christmas for Jesus coming to save us and knowing we can go to heaven. Through all of the struggles I've had lately, I know God is with me. His love for me will help me through when I don't think I can. How do I know? Because I see His love for me through all of the people around me that he's working through.
So, where was God today, this month? You are God's hands and feet, His voice, His arms to hug me when I need it. Thank you!
Blessings,
Jennifer

Dad

I know some weren't able to be at the service today so I'm sharing what I wrote and read for my dad today.

How do I sum up my dad? He taught me so much and I have been so blessed to have the relationship with my dad and with my family that I do. I am who I am because of the way he raised me and because of the role model that he has always been for me. 

My dad was my biggest supporter and encourager, sometimes just listening, sometimes just saying a few words that made all the difference. When I started writing my blog, I knew he read every word. When I recently switched jobs, he listened as I talked and let me know I was doing the right thing. Even when I made mistakes, I knew he loved me anyway.

My dad was a quiet man who thought about what he said before he said it. So, when he spoke, I listened. But, just when you least expected it, his dry sense of humor would come out! 

In these last few weeks, my dad wanted to make sure that everyone knew that even in this time, he hadn’t lost his sense of humor! All of the nurses and staff, the family and friends who visited, and anyone around him were all gifted with his words of wisdom and stories. He told us we could use them all for his funeral. I told him that the funeral would last 10 hours! With a smile he said “well, I think I’m worth it!” I agreed. So, sit back, relax, and get comfortable! Just kidding!

My dad loved his family. We never had any doubt. He and my mom were married for 47 wonderful years and had a relationship that gave my sister and me an example of what our marriages should be like. They loved each other, took care of each other, and enjoyed spending time together. I remember as a kid, whenever my dad worked out of town, he called my mom every night. He always filled the car with gas so my mom wouldn’t have to do it. He did so many things to show his love for my mom.

Just this past summer, we spent a week at a family reunion enjoying several of the things he loved best. Family, vacation, and time on the water. 

For 2 years, my dad had talked about the previous reunion when he was about to go on a jetski ride but couldn’t because the weather shifted. So, he was determined that this would be the time! And it was! At 84, my dad had a blast riding the jetski on Lake Ontario, waving to us as he and my cousin flew by! Afterwards, he decided since he already had his suit on, it was time for a swim. I’m not a fan of the cold water, but if my dad could do it, I figured I could top. So, together, we hung out swimming in the lake. After that, we warmed up in the hot tub. What a day that was! What joy my dad had remembering that time and telling people of his adventure!

Every summer, we would spend a lot of weekends camping! We had so much fun in our little trailer! Vacations spent at Dewey Lake were a part of our childhood that I will always treasure. In later years, they had a pop-up trailer and would go camping with a group from the church. When they weren’t out with them, they enjoyed going out to leisure lakes to sit outside by the lake.

My dad also loved God and his church. His faith in God was something I always looked up to. When I was younger, I remember my dad looking for a job after the machine shop closed. He would go to seminars that talked about things to do to help find a job. He was told not to put any of his church involvement in his resume. My dad didn’t agree with this and kept it in there. When he found a job, his boss told him that was one of the reasons he stood out. His boss was a Gideon and I know God put my dad there with a boss who was also a Christian. That impacted me so much and has been an example for me to follow. Never deny faith in God, and live out that faith by serving others. 

Each night as my dad would pray at dinner, he would say “bless this food to our bodies and us to thy service.” In his last weeks, he was troubled that he felt he was no longer serving God. I told him there were different ways to serve and sometimes the way to serve was to let others serve or learn from him. He told me I sounded like a church worker and we both laughed. 

Dad was always serving at the church in some way or another, as an elder, in the choir, and even as interim director for the choir and bell choir, among other things. More recently, he spent countless hours as the treasurer for the church. Serving God by serving others was just natural for me to do because it’s how we grew up. 

My dad was a perfectionist… especially when it came to mowing the lawn and trimming the bushes. I remember working outside for what seemed like forever growing up. Recently, when I would go to my parents and do yardwork, my dad would come outside with me and bring a lawn chair and sit down while I worked. At first I thought it was the perfectionist in him coming out to make sure I did things right, but I realized it wasn’t that. He just wanted to sit out there with me. Outside worktime was also much shorter than when I was growing up. After maybe an hour, he would say, “I think you’ve gotten a lot done. We should go inside now.” I would think to myself that I wanted to stay outside and do more (afterall, I got my perfectionist tendencies from him) but I would go inside with him, thinking that I wished working outside was this short when I was a kid! 

He loved music! He would listen to songs on the radio and direct from his seat because he remembered directing that piece when he was in band in high school. He loved Sousa marches, classical music, hymns and choral music. I remember singing in the Messiah and when we would get to the Amen chorus, I knew I couldn’t look at my dad because he would be teary, which would make me teary, which made singing the Amen chorus pretty difficult. In his last days, we played music to comfort and relax him. 

When Rafael was born, my dad was so excited to be a grandpa! We went to Bakers Square for dinner the night before Rafael was born. I felt like I was having contractions but I wanted heath bar pie so I didn’t mention it. Afterwards, my dad decided we would stop at Menards so I thought I better let them know. Who knows how long he’d spend there! I told them. We went anyway, but probably didn’t stay long. When we got to the hospital, the engineer in my dad came out. He was fascinated by the machine that told us when a contraction was coming. So, he told me whenever I was getting one. (in case I didn’t know, I guess ;) ) Always using his engineering mind! 

The last time Rafael went to see him, as Rafael was leaving, my dad worked to get his hand out from under the blankets, no longer an easy thing for him to do, so that he could shake Rafael’s hand. So much was said in that handshake.

Dad built Rafael a puppet stage, a swingset, and made many beautiful things out of wood throughout his life. He loved figuring out how to make things… and we could be assured he was going to use his cad program! He even used it to create blank templates for his sudoku game he did every day.   

His illness was quick and I spent 2 weeks in shock at what was happening. But, I am so grateful that even in his last days, my dad knew what was going on, had his mind, had his sense of humor, and had his faith in God. And he knee that we loved him.

I am so grateful for the faith and love for God that my parents raised me to learn and know. Being raised in a home where God was just a part of our everyday lives was a blessing I can't begin to explain. And, in times like this, I am assured of a God who loves me and my family, and right now, even more important to me, I am assured that my God prepared a wonderful place for my dad. When he arrived, he no longer felt pain. Talking just last week, my dad quoted from the Bible of God preparing a place and that in heaven there would be no more tears. Knowing that my dad has this peace and knowing that he is with Jesus gives me some comfort. 

I love you dad! See you when I get there!

Joy

Today is the 3rd Sunday of advent- Joy! At first, thinking about everything going on right now, it's hard to find joy. It's been a week since my dad passed and I feel like I'm in a daze. It still doesn't seem possible. As I drove to Joliet last night, I struggled, thinking about how each week I would usually call my dad on my way. Then, as I walked in the house I would be greeted by my parents and then I would sit down and we would talk about the week we had and plans for the weekend. I can't do that anymore and it's hard... really hard. Things will never be the same again.
But, I can't stop there. I can't dwell on that for too long. I can see now how people can withdraw and shut people out. But, I have to seek God in this time. And, in this season of advent, I have to look for the joy!
It doesn't take long for me to find it once I start looking. I am getting constant reminders of the joy around me. It's in the friends and family that have surrounded us during this time. I've gotten messages, cards, phone calls, and surprises throughout the last few weeks and they have kept me going. I know that God is holding me up by using the love of those around me. Without that, I wouldn't be able to handle anything. I've been so touched by the ways people have shown up in my life to help me through this time. My employers have been awesome, the people from the churches I'm a part of in some way have all been so thoughtful in so many ways, family and friends have reached out, and so many people who loved my dad have shared stories with me.
Today was the visitation. We had pictures of my dad all around, a video of pictures of my dad, and family and friends coming to pay their respects to my dad. So many wonderful memories were in that room today! What joy those memories were filled with! I saw people I hadn't seen in forever and people I see all the time. I got to hear stories of my dad and hear how loved he was.
Tomorrow, we will have a celebration of his life. My sister and I have tried to make it a time to honor our dad and share the love we had for him with the people that will be there. I am counting on joy being a part of our day.
I can't guarantee that there won't be tears tomorrow. In fact, I can pretty much guarantee that there will be tears. (Hopefully, I will get through speaking with a minimal amount of tears.) I know that there will be days ahead that will be really hard. But, I am grateful for the people in my life who I can count on to help me through those times.
So, where was God today? He was in the people who were a part of today, showing love for my dad and for me. And, he's been in the people around me the last few weeks helping me get through the hard days.
Blessings,
Jennifer

Peace

Peace... today is the 2nd Sunday in advent. I have loved focusing on the words or advent over the past years- especially as I was leading youth group and each Sunday we did activities to help us focus and experience each week.
Hope was easy. We always talked about bringing hope to others through helping those in need- Salvation Army bell ringing, making cards for people, etc. But, this year advent started out differently. It was just over 2 weeks ago when we found out my dad had 3 brain tumors.
Last Sunday, the 1st Sunday of advent, my focus of hope was on bringing hope to reality as we brought my dad home from hospice house. I had seen the look of hope in his eyes as he told me he wanted to go home and as we promised him that we would bring him home. We were blessed to make that happen.
Each year, leading the youth, peace was always different. There were always so many directions we could go- peace in the world, peace and forgiveness, peace and quiet time with God, the list goes on.
Every year for birthdays and Christmas my sister and I would ask my dad what he wanted. He would smile and say "peace and quiet". We would laugh and say that it was impossible and that he had to choose something else. (except for the year my sister got him 2 fish and named them peace and quiet)
Tonight, the 2nd Sunday in advent has a whole new existence in my mind and heart. This week, I watched my dad go from being able to talk to not responding, seeing him in pain, and knowing things would never be the same. They say hearing is the last sense to go. So, I talked, I read scripture, I played music, and I told him I loved him... a lot. I'm not sure if it was more to comfort my dad or me. As much as I saw him fading away, I felt him holding on. He didn't want to leave my mom. He wanted to take care of her, to be with her, to always help her through her illness. He held on as long as he could.
It's so quiet. For 2 weeks I've been listening to him breathe, listening to the hum of the oxygen, and now they're both silent. Tonight, he is at peace. He's no longer in pain, no longer worried. He's with Jesus.
I prayed for peace for him, asked others to pray for peace for him, told my dad all we wanted was for him to be at peace. Honestly, the instant he was gone I wanted to take it back, to tell my dad I was wrong and that he couldn't go because I wasn't going to be ok like I promised him I would. I'm not ok. But, I love my dad more than the pain of this moment. And, the promise of his peace and thinking of the amazing moment when he reached heaven will get me through and eventually, I will feel more peace than pain.
So, where was God today? He was welcoming my dad to heaven and showing him the place He prepared for him.
Blessings,
Jennifer

Learning

I sat down to write last night, but the screen remained blank. Earlier in the day I had thought of something I wanted to write about, but when I finally had a chance, I couldn't remember. There are too many things going on in my brain right now.
I sit here listening to the oxygen tank humming, my dad snoring, and my phone dinging that I got another message. The day has been hectic as caregivers and family have been by.
I've spent my days caring for my parents, cleaning and sorting through years and years of things that have accumulated in their house, and communicating with family and friends.
I read something on facebook yesterday that talked about it being an honor to care for our loved ones as they age and need more care. I definitely agree with that. Being able to spend this time together, being there to fulfill their needs, being one of the few to be able to tell if my dad is just breathing or whispering something and being able to understand it (most of the time) and being able to hold his hand and tell him I love him more times than I can count, is something I am grateful that I can do in these days. Would I rather he was well and could live forever? Absolutely! But, that's not possible. So, I am grateful for what I have been given.
My phone continues to ding- a message here, a text there, and emails. What would I do without these random words of thoughtfulness, the promises of prayer, and the questions and concern from loved ones? Honestly, I don't know what I would do. Thankfully, I don't have to find out! But, it makes me appreciate the people in my circles even more than I did before. It makes me aware of ways that have touched my heart like I have never felt before. It's teaching me how to better love others who are hurting, going through hard times, or overwhelmed because I am experiencing it first-hand.
Hospice has been amazing and I consider it to be a gift from God. Getting my dad into hospice house in a matter of a few hours when there are only 16 beds is nothing short of a miracle. Their way of taking care of both the patient and the family and friends is the epitome of radical hospitality! While staying there with my dad, I didn't have to think about anything I needed because they were caring for me, too. I got to just focus on my dad and our family. How can I care for others like that? How can I show radical hospitality to others going through things so that they can focus on their situation?
Last, but definitely not least, I am so grateful for the faith and love for God that my parents raised me to learn and know. Being raised in a home where God was just a part of our everyday lives was a blessing I can't begin to explain. And, in times like this, I am assured of a God who loves me and my family, and right now, even more important to me, I am assured that my God has prepared a wonderful place for my dad. When he arrives, he will no longer feel pain. Talking just last week, my dad quoted from the Bible of God preparing a place and that in heaven there would be no more tears. Knowing that my dad has this peace and knowing that he will be with Jesus gives me some comfort. This has instilled in me a rejuvenated calling to help those who don't have this peace. If I didn't have my faith and assurance in God, I would be struggling to deal with this even more than I already am. I can't fathom going through the rough times without my faith. My hope comes from my faith that God walks beside us until the day we walk home with Him.
In any situation there are lessons to be learned, ways we can grow, and people we can both learn from and help by teaching. The key is to look for the opportunities before us and realize them for what they are.
So, where was God today? He was walking beside me...sometimes holding my hand and sometimes helping me to look for the opportunities to grow.
Blessings,
Jennifer

Advent

Advent devotion-

Season of Advent Through the Eyes of a Daughter

Throughout the month of November, I focused on being thankful. And, in the last week, I have become so very grateful for all of the things God has blessed me with during this hard time. Prayers from loved ones and strangers, compassion and kindness from those working to help my dad, and family and friends reaching out and offering to help are all things I'm thankful for. Now, a word from my dad or him drinking a tiny bit of ginger ale brings me unspeakable joy! I'm realizing the little things that mean so much right now are things we should treasure always.

Now, we begin the season of advent- hope, peace, joy, and love! During this time, sometimes functioning is a struggle. But, when I am struggling the most, God sends me reminders of hope, peace, joy, and His love! 

I have never been more grateful for the gift of Jesus, who was born to save us so that we can be with God in heaven. That gives me hope for a future with Him. And, it gives me hope for a time when my dad will be free from the pain and the illness that has taken over his body will be gone. But, I have also seen hope when my dad asked if he could go home and that, then became my hope, too. So, it's fitting that my dad came home on this first Sunday of advent, Hope! 

After my dad found out about his tumors, but before he struggled to speak more than a word or two, he told me that he had a direct line to the Big Guy. He knows where he will be heading. And, although a little choked up as he spoke, he definitely had a peace about him that only God can give.

Joy! This has to be my favorite! My dad is typically on the quiet side. He has a very dry sense of humor that comes out when you least expect it! But, last week, he wanted to make sure everyone knew that he never lost his sense of humor! Even today, as he was getting ready to get into the ambulance, I said "Dad, behave." His reply, "Always." The unspoken words that I knew he was saying because he's been saying it for a long time, "I always behave, sometimes good, sometimes bad!" But, my personal favorite was a new one for me. I told him of all of the people praying for him. He smiled and said, "Every little bit helps, just like the old woman said as she was peeing in the ocean!" That's my dad, bringing joy even now!

Love, I can't even begin to share how much I love my dad and how much I know my dad loves me! When I stop and think about all of the things he has done for me, it's overwhelming. Now, as my sister and I care for him, he says we shouldn't have to do this. But, we tell him that after all of the years he took care of us, it's only right that we care for him. So, when I think about God, Our Father, who loves us as His children, oh how wonderful that is! He has taken such good care of me and now, it's only right that I do everything I can to show my love for Him! What that looks like is different for everyone. God gives us each our own gifts and opportunities to use them for Him. 

So, this advent season, enjoy the hope and peace that God has given you in Jesus, the joy and love He has given you in caring for you! But, remember that God has great plans for you to share His love with everyone throughout this season and always. So, make sure you're not too busy getting ready for Christmas to celebrate advent!

Blessings,

Jennifer

Moments

I'm sitting next to my dad listening to old hymns. It doesn't sound like a big, exciting thing to some. But, it's a moment I will treasure always. When I tell you that my dad will soon be able to hear the angels singing these hymns, it changes your perspective a little.
But, why should it? We are given the blessing of time with loved ones and moments of joy each day. But, so many times we let moments go by unnoticed or unappreciated or even worse, not taken. We're all guilty of half listening as we think of other things, choosing to play a game or scrolling through facebook, or whatever else rather than stopping to enjoy the gifts right in front of us.
This week more than ever, I am realizing how life changes in an instant. A week ago today, I found out my dad has three tumors. Tonight, I sit with him in a hospice home savoring each moment we have together. We don't know what's next. But, we need to realize what we can have now!
As I drove today, I wondered how many were cutting Thanksgiving short to shop for deals rather than spend time with family and friends. But, years from now, will we remember what we bought or the moments we spent together? I will remember the moments I spent eating and laughing with my husband and family in town and then spending the morning and night with my dad listening to hymns and the smile he got when my mom kissed him goodbye for the night.
I will remember his quiet sense of humor that still shows up as my sister left saying "Behave for Jen." And, my dad, who can barely whisper more that a yes or no at this point, saying "I always behave", leaving off the rest of his response that we all know because we've heard him say it before with a twinkle in his eye. "Sometimes good, sometimes bad." That's my dad, making us smile always, and showing his love for his family.
Don't take things for granted. Always let people know how thankful you are for them. Stop and listen and take time for the moments.
So where was God today? This week?
While this week has been devastating, God has given me so many gifts! The love and prayers from so many, the compassionate people at hospice house, which was a miracle for us to be able to bring dad to, and the times spent with my dad have all shown me that even in the most devastating times, I can see God beside me.
Blessings,
Jennifer

My biggest fan of Godsightings, my dad, printed them out and showed them to my mom who no longer uses a computer. Whenever I stopped writing, he mentioned that he missed them. Whenever I started writing, even just once in a long while, he let me know his happiness that I wrote it. I thought about not writing anymore, but that wouldn't make my dad happy. I told him I would be sitting right next to him listening to music with him and writing a Godsighting. I asked him if he wanted me to read it to him. He answered me "yes". So, I'll read as much as I can. It might take awhile to get through.
Hopefully, someone else will appreciate it, too.

Mission

In June, I went on my third trip to Guatemala. Each trip I've taken there has been life- changing! This trip was no different. I felt a sense of love and peace, and an even more intense connection to God. There has always been something special for me when on mission trips, but this one was even more special. But, as I prepared to head home, my stomach was in knots. I was saddened to leave everything I was there. 

I came home and worked on processing my transition back. As the days went on, God was working on me and helping me to realize that it was time for me to leave my job that was becoming a toxic situation and to seek the feeling I had while I was away. Why couldn't I feel that peace and love, and have that intense connection to God daily. But, I struggled with the thought of leaving my children, youth, and families. As much as I felt missions as my calling, I knew that children and youth was no less of a calling. God had assured me that I was just as important to His children and youth as I always had been. So, what was He telling me?

And then, I knew! God had a plan! Once I decided that I had no choice but to leave my current position, God had a plan to use my gifts for children, youth, and mission all together. I wanted everyone to be able to have opportunities to experience what I had experienced on my trips. So, that began my journey to start a mission hosting organization! Over the years, I had thought about the possibilities but it had never been the right time or situation. Now was the right time! And, I soon realized the perfect situation! 

I contacted the pastor at the church that I thought would be perfect since they have such a heart for mission and I had seen the love their pastor and congregation had shown others. When we met, it was evident that God was in the room. Throughout the planning, I have felt God has been walking beside me and cheering me on! I have felt the love and support of those who have been working with me to get this going.

I am so excited to say that on Wednesday night, the session at the church who I have asked to host the teams voted to approve my mission organization! I am so excited to see where this leads!

Michigan City Missions is a reality! We will offer opportunities for teams to serve in several different ways, depending on what works best for their team, and for a very reasonable cost so that everyone can be a part of the experience! These were 2 of my goals when I started.

Several churches have contacted me and we are working on scheduling for their 2020 mission trips!

What could have been a very rough time has become an amazing few months of listening and working with God to continue bringing children and youth to Him and sharing His love with them! I have been blessed to have found jobs that I absolutely love and that I can continue to work for and to have a dream realized with the mission trip organization! 

I believe that God doesn't bring us the hard times, the struggles. He gave us free will and some people choose to sin and others, unfortunately, end up suffering from their sin. But, God definitely can use those times to create good. And, that's what I have experienced recently! What an amazing God we have!

Heaven

This past Sunday, I was really struck by the sermon and some conversations I had before the sermon at First Presbyterian Church in Michigan City. The scripture focus was on Revelations 21:1-4. 

Revelation 21:1-4(NIV) A New Heaven and a New Earth

"Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth,”for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’[b] or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”"

I have recently read Revelations, but there is so much in there and each time I read it I am struck by new things. This time was no different. 

First of all, heaven is one of the great mysteries of life. But, I think most people have some idea in their head of what their heaven would be. So, this Sunday I began gathering my random thoughts of "my heaven". I think heaven is surrounded with a feeling of love and peace. People treat each other in ways to make sure that peace and love are felt by those around them. How does that happen? Listening, caring, serving, thinking of others needs and finding ways to tend to them. Upon arrival, the sounds of the Amen chorus from Handel's Messiah will welcome everyone who enters. Whenever I've sung it, that is how I've pictured heaven sounding. Abundant joy! I can't forget the joy, the fun that will be in heaven! That brings me to another song! "Big, Big House" details God's house in heaven with lots and lots of rooms, a table with lots and lots of food, and a big yard where we can play football! This old VBS favorite always makes me smile as I sing and do the motions and picture the joy in heaven! I have told people that at my funeral, this song better be sung- and everyone must do the motions! (we can do it again if everyone doesn't participate in the fun! And, just ask some of my former youth, they'll tell you I'm serious about doing it again!) Of course, loved ones will be around us, and the Most Loving One, Jesus, with His arms outstretched to wrap us in a big hug! 

Secondly, what is the scripture saying? God is with us and He will be our comforter. And, that's not all! The old will pass away and be replaced by heaven here on earth! 

We are called to do what we can to create heaven on earth, to bring heaven to those around us. How do we do that? I'm working on what I need to do. Going back to my thoughts of heaven, I need to listen, care, serve, and tend to others needs. I'm not going to go around singing Handel's Messiah, but how can I bring that feeling of overwhelming peace and beauty to others? I'm thinking about that. Bringing to others abundant joy and fun, laughter and showing hospitality sounds like a great goal! And, I'm determined to have have fun working on that!

What does your heaven look like, feel like, sound like, look like? How can you give that experience to those around you? How can you bring heaven to earth?
Blessings,
Jennifer

Movies

(While I am looking at this in the context of children, teens, and young adults, I am sure there are adults who this can relate to also. It just became a realization to me after conversations with teens.)
I love a cheesy Hallmark movie! I know how it's going to end 5 minutes into the movie, but it doesn't make it any less fun to watch. There is always a dramatic, romantic happy ending- the one we've been waiting for throughout the movie!
I also love watching Christian movies and have been excited to see that more and more Christian movies have become popular. In the last few years, more Christian movies have hit the theaters than ever before. I have taken this as a good sign for society.
What could be bad about positive, wholesome movies becoming available for people to watch? Whether it's about the fun of romance that is portrayed as Hallmark movies tend to, PG rated as opposed to R, or Christian movies that get people thinking and talking about God more, I have been happy to see their popularity.
But, I came to a realization this past week that has possibly changed my perspective. At the very least, it has caused me to think and made me realize I need to have more conversations about them. I have lived long enough, seen and experienced enough, to know that life doesn't always happen like it does in the movies. But, when movies are advertised as "based on a true story" and people haven't had as many experiences and people are questioning and searching for direction and answers, I think these Christian movies can hurt us. You see, when people are looking for answers and trying to figure out what they believe, they search for what they have access to. And, when they see movie after movie of miracle after miracle, when they see how God is so apparent and practically has a neon sign directing someone's path, and then they don't experience that mountain top, earth shattering moment in time, I think it makes them doubt that God is in their lives. They wonder why they question and why they don't have all the answers like the people in the movies. And, then that makes them feel like they are bad, or wrong, or not as important.
I'm sure this was never the intention of the movies, but it's something we need to be aware of. It's something we need to have conversations about. Some people are "born again" and have a big moment in life, can name the day and time when they said yes to God. Some people have known God all their lives and just knew He was a part of everything in their lives. Some people question things and that is the way they develop their own beliefs. Some people have experienced or witnessed a big miracle while others witness miracles daily in the sun rising or setting and the birds singing. We need to make sure people know that just as love and relationships don't always happen like the Hallmark movies, our love and relationship with God doesn't always happen like the Christian movies.

Mission Week- Tuskegee, AL 2019

I've been home just over 24 hours. Since then, I've led a Parent's Night Out where 3 of the youth volunteered to help, gone to church where I saw half the team this morning, and answered numerous calls, texts, and conversations about youth group tonight. My team just got back and are wanting youth group so we can all be together again! I call that a win!

I figured out this week that this is my 18th mission trip, 16th that I have planned and led, the other 2 I just helped with. Each trip has been so different! That proved to be the case this year, too. After several years of doing projects like helping in soup kitchens, food pantries, and other "social justice activities", I realized my group was ready for a construction trip. It was time to go back to Tuskegee, AL, the place where it all began. 

With plans in place down to the last detail, I was ready to go! In fact, my biggest stress seemed to be that I couldn't figure out what was left to do the week before we left! Everything was working right on schedule! So, that meant it was time to let go and let God take over. I learned the first year that all the planning ahead was great, but once we left it was time for me to give control over to Him. (Of course He was definitely in the planning part, too, but I love watching Him show up on every trip throughout the week!)

This trip was a great mix of participants. With 7 girls and 5 guys, it's probably the most even we've ever had. We had 3 new mission trip participants, 1 senior who is on her last mission trip as a student, and everything in between. There were some who were already close and others who didn't know each other very well before the trip.

On each trip, the scripture theme really sets the tone for the trip. Sometimes I know that way ahead of time and sometimes it just hits me near the beginning of the trip as I get to know the group. That was the case this time. Colossians 3:12- 17 became a clear guide for us throughout the week. Each small group chose words from the scripture to focus on and keep their small group members accountable for. Each day, our focus remained on how God expected us to act based on that scripture. 

On one particular evening, our nighttime closing turned into hours of discussing the difference between our life choices and the words this scripture encourages us to use as a guide for our life choices. Our discussion led to encouragement, love, and support from each other to make the right life choices and gave the group assurance that when one is struggling, the rest of the group will always be there to help. Those are the moments when God takes over! 

On the first workday, I could see the hesitation- the roofing team wasn't sure about getting on the roof and the porch team wasn't sure they could figure out how to accomplish their project. By day 2, the roofing team was walking on the roof with confidence and the porch team was getting things done and knew what they still had to do and how to do it. The transition was amazing in just one day! 

But, by the end of the week, the transition on day 2 was nothing compared to the transition their hearts had made, the transition in their relationships with each other and with God. For the opportunity to witness God in action, I am grateful. 

If we look at this scripture as a screen to make decisions through, how will our lives transition?

"Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. And whatever you do,whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." Colossians 3:12-17

So, where was God this week? He was speaking to us through His word, He was loving us through the support of others who were His hands and feet, and He was working with us and encouraging us every step of the way.

Blessings,

Jennifer

Spring

Happy spring! I know many have been anxiously awaiting the arrival of warm weather, flowers, birds chirping, and sunshine! I am one of those people. Spring represents newness, freshness, and joy to me. Grass and flowers grow, animals come out of hiding, and people want to be outside rather inside because the weather is warmer. It's also spring cleaning time. We get rid of the dust and the junk, open up the windows, and everything seems fresh and clean!
What about us? During this season of lent and now spring, what are we doing that helps us to be new and fresh and joyful? How are we getting rid of the dust and junk in our own lives? What spiritual disciplines can we work to make new habits in our lives?
Recently, I discovered "The Bible Project". I am loving my Bible reading time because I understand so much more after listening to the youtube video on the book of the Bible I'm reading! Each day, as I walk dogs, I listen to "The Bible Project" and then several chapters of the book I am reading. If you haven't checked it out yet, click on it in this newsletter. For Bible reading plans or devotions, check out the app "Youversion". They have so many to choose from that there is definitely something for everyone!
We all get so busy that sometimes we forget to stop and take some time out to spend with God. I find that to be true for me sometimes. But, if my phone goes off with a reminder notification, I always check it. So, I'm putting reminders in a few times a day to stop and take some time out for God. Hopefully, after awhile I won't need my phone to go off to remind me, but until then, I'm glad I have technology that I can use in a positive way.
I am grateful for so many volunteers who help to make the children and youth ministry such a blessing to so many families. I see so many adults devoted to the ministries they volunteer for. But, I hope that while you are pouring into others, you also take time to fill up your spiritual cup. Take some time this spring to renew your spirit. Schedule in some extra quiet time, find a new devotional and take time to read each day, have lunch with a friend who you can have spiritual growth discussions with. Do something to strengthen your relationship with God so that you are able to continue helping others to strengthen their relationships with God.
Blessings,
Jennifer

Holy Spirit

I'm home from an amazing time doing the 30 hour famine! I love the 30 hour famine for many reasons- it makes the youth get a new perspective of their lives and the lives of people all over the world, it gets them out of their comfort zone and helps them experience things they have never experienced before, it helps them find new ways to get closer to God and each other, and helps them realize they can do amazing things! I mean, how can anything be more awesome than that? The famine is also a reminder of my call to ministry.
Although I had felt a call a few years earlier, people filled my head with doubts and I believed them. But, when the opportunity came to lead a 30 hour famine, I knew it was something I was supposed to do. Originally, it started because I was "being a mom." My son had gotten sick just before the famine the previous year and was so sad he missed it. The next year, nobody had volunteered to do it and so it wasn't going to happen. I couldn't let that him miss it again and so I volunteered to do it, having no idea what God was about to do! But He knew! So, by the time the famine actually came, I had been asked to lead the youth and was officially starting a few weeks later. But, that event was the beginning of it all! And so, each year as I do the famine, I consider it my anniversary of following God's call for me. And, I am grateful that He continues calling me to new challenges, continues speaking to me and teaching me, and continues blessing me. I just have to listen and watch...and be aware!
This year was a little different as the famine time was approaching. It wasn't that I wasn't excited about it, but I hadn't spent every waking moment planning every minute detail for weeks and months. I knew something was going to be different..I knew it was going to be a totally different event. I just didn't know what it was. The weeks got closer and I still didn't have my plan. I'm a spreadsheet and list person. I plan everything, knowing God might change it, but it's all planned with backup plans when needed. But, I had no lists or spreadsheets. And I didn't understand why.
Driving one day, I was thinking and praying about it and I finally got my answer. This year was to be totally different! Although it was to be a 30 Hour Famine, I was to focus on the Holy Spirit! It was as clear to me right then as if God was sitting next to me in the car talking to me (which I believe He was). I can't tell you why I knew it wasn't something I planned- why I can tell when God gives me an idea. I just know that sometimes I do things that on my own I never would think of. Then it seems the thoughts just keep coming and it all falls into place.
The thoughts just rolled out and I realized why He took so long to tell me. I had a lot less planning to do...a lot more praying and a lot more trusting...but not so many lists and spreadsheets. Why? Because I wasn't planning every minute of the 30 hours. I was trusting Him for 30 Hours.
With a focus on the Holy Spirit, we talked about our spiritual gifts and the group took spiritual gift surveys to help them realize their gifts and how they could use them. Then, we discussed spiritual disciplines and focused on 12 of them. The youth then divided into 3 groups and each group was given spiritual disciplines to plan and lead experiences throughout the famine. Each spiritual discipline was focused on for an hour, except fasting which we got to focus on the whole time! The youth did an amazing job using their gifts to share with the other groups and lead experiences that helped them all realize how the spiritual disciplines could help them get a better relationship with God! They thought of things I never would have thought of! Our worship this morning was awesome! Our prayer stations were inspiring! Our service projects were beautiful and they were so excited to be doing them! The mural turned out to be a great presentation of everything the weekend was about, and the video where they shared their thoughts about the famine made it clear that the Holy Spirit was working in and through them!
I have to admit as much as I try to always trust in Him, it was a little scary! But, as the start of the famine approached, I knew I just had to trust that He had this one. I joked with several people beforehand and said this would either be amazing or go horribly wrong. But, knowing He had given me the inspiration for it all, I was counting on amazing! I am grateful that He didn't let me down! It was amazing!
So, where was God today? He was in every moment that went into the 30 Hour famine, and I believe He is working in the lives of all that participated in the event and I feel blessed to have experienced it.
Blessings,
Jennifer

Sticky Situations

My son turned 25 the other day. Where did the time go?! It goes so much faster than we think it will when they are little. And, I thought I'd remember every adorable moment, but I'm sure I don't. More than moments, I remember things we did. For instance, I remember the wooden container shaped like a loaf of bread that contained scripture verses. I remember that my son was so excited to take one out each day and read it. But, I can't remember any of the actual moments he read them.
I remember that he loved being read to. So, every night I would read him a page from the book "Sticky Situations". It had stories where kids had to figure out the right way to handle a "sticky situation" in the way that God would want them to. Those stories brought on other conversations and a time for learning about making good choices. I treasured those conversations!
Lives get busy and families today are busier than ever! But, I encourage you to find little ways to have those treasured conversations. Make it a routine in your busy schedule- 5 minutes at bedtime, on the way to sports practice, whatever works for you. You will look back when your children are turning 25 and be grateful for those treasured moments.
Each week, beginning today, one of the three sections will include a family devotion and a video for kids. Find a time to read and watch them during the week. There are links at the bottom of the newsletter if you would like to find a daily family devotional. In a time when families barely have time to eat dinner, let alone sit down together, we have to find a way to make time to connect, even if it's in the car or they go to bed 5 minutes later so they can spend that time with you. Check out the devotion links and the weekly family devotions we send.
Blessings,
Jennifer Casper

Shoveling

The other day, I went outside to shovel out my car so I could get to work. Just after I started, my neighbor pulled into his driveway. He immediately got out, grabbed his shovel and started helping me. We chatted while shoveling and knowing he had recently been on a trip, I offered to get his mail if he went away again. He told me he had just gone skiing in Europe! While there, he fell and shattered his helmet when he was skiing the alps. Then, he told me the most amazing story!
Last week, he had texted my husband to tell him someone was in our backyard. They both went out and by then, nobody was there but they concluded it must have been someone chasing a dog. The neighbor told my husband he had the worst migraine and that he had never had one before. My husband suggested he go to the hospital to get a shot like I have to do at times when my migraine is really bad. He ended up going and said he probably never would have gone if my husband hadn't suggested it. It turns out he had a brain bleed! If he hadn't gone to the hospital when he did, things would have been bad.
I took this as a reminder from God. We never know how God will use anything we say, do, or go through. And, if we think he isn't in on the little conversations but only pays attention to the big stuff, we are wrong. God is in our lives for the big and little stuff and he uses it all for good!

Intentional Outreach

Each year I pick a word and scripture to focus on. Last year, my word was “out” and my scripture verse was the Great Commission. This year, my word is “Intentional” and my scripture verse is 1 Corinthians 9:24- 27. “You’ve all been to the stadium and seen the athletes race. Everyone runs; one wins. Run to win. All good athletes train hard. They do it for a gold medal that tarnishes and fades. You’re after one that’s gold eternally. I don’t know about you, but I’m running hard for the finish line. I’m giving it everything I’ve got. No sloppy living for me! I’m staying alert and in top condition. I’m not going to get caught napping, telling everyone else all about it and then missing out myself.”

I’ve been thinking and studying this thought as it pertains to my life and to my work. My plan is to be even more intentional about reaching out and sharing the gospel with others. I love my family and my church family- too much! What?! Well, in looking at my life, I am surrounded by awesome people, but they are mostly already connected to the church. (Don’t worry! I still plan to spend just as much time with all of you that I am blessed to have in my life!) So, reaching out has to be more intentional because it means I have to go to new places and find new people to share God with! So, here are some ways I am working on being intentional in my outreach. Some are new and some I started last year.

1. I spend Monday afternoons at a coffee shop. This has been a really great experience so far and I have loved connecting with new people and current friends. So far, in the 2 visits, I have connected with a church member who hasn’t come in years, a church member who just started coming again after a year without coming, someone who has been to the church a few times and is interested in learning more about the church, 2 moms not from the church who have brought their children to a childrens event recently, an active family that regularly attends church and the children and youth activities, and 2 young adults who were very hurt by another church and were raised going to church but stopped after being hurt.
2. I visit the preschool often and have a regular storytime visit every month with each class. This month we are ice skating in the classroom! So much fun with preschoolers!
3. Wednesday has become my tech morning. I have been writing newsletters to reach out to parents of children who have participated in activities at the church as part of my tech day. I also share the newsletter on facebook.
4. I am discovering Instagram. It’s a process, but my goal is to post challenges (in AM) and encouragement (in PM) daily.
5. I walk my dogs before work every morning. I use this time to listen to a Bible study and several devotions. But, I also use it to pray for my neighborhood and am carrying brochures to be able to hand out to people I talk to who might be interested.
6. Facebook can be a terrible thing. But, I have been using it lately to reach out to people I haven’t seen in awhile who may be struggling. I’ve met with 4 people just this week who I connected with years ago and who are interested in finding out more about the church. Also, I am involved with several parent groups and community groups on facebook and continually share what is going on.
7. I’m not promising anything, but as I thought about places to go to connect with new people where I would enjoy and that would be good for me too, I had a church member invite me to a free class at a new workout place. And, as I thought about it, I realized maybe this is a way to reach new people as we connect while meeting regularly every week. I’ll keep you posted on whether I survive tomorrow or not!
8. Thursday I am meeting with people from drug court to see if I can become a mentor with that program. A friend who has done this now has brought 2 people to church who now regularly attend.

So, those are just 8 ways I’ve incorporated God and sharing His message into my world. But, I feel there is another responsibility I have, and anyone who is a leader of the church. We have to equip others to incorporate sharing God’s message into their world. It may look different than mine, but the focus is the same. So, that’s what I intend to work on.

Why do we all have to work to build up the church and spread the gospel? Yes, I work at a church and therefore it is my responsibility to do those things. But, aren’t we all Christians and commanded to “Go and make disciples of all men”? If you went to work and told your kids to make their bed while you are gone and you come home and they haven’t made their beds, but they say “we talked a lot about making our beds and we watched great videos on youtube about it! We even wrote a song about it!” How happy would you be? So, how good are we at following God’s command of what we are to do until He comes back? What can you do differently this year?

Magic of Winter

I am the first to admit that I would love living where it's warm all year. I am definitely not a fan of winter! But, I do have to admit there are some things about winter that are magical! Of course, there is Christmas and all of the joy and excitement that it brings. 
But, there is something special about New Year's Day! I've been watching facebook the last few days and seeing so many posts about the year ahead- their hopes, their dreams, their plans to change and do better. And, I've seen a lot of posts reflecting on the year behind them- the good, the bad, the ugly! What makes that date on the calendar such a life- changing moment? How is it that we feel a sense of freedom and change because the calendar turns to a new day? Why can't each day be a time for opportunities to do better, to reflect on the past and learn from it and then move on? As I was pondering that, I thoughts of God. Once we put our faith in Him, each day can be a New Year's Day! Each day we are given a clean slate and have opportunities to do better. Because of God, we are forgiven of our past and given a chance to do better. What a blessing! We all mess up! But, with Jesus, we have been given a chance to get things right.
The other thing that feels magical to me is the first snow. You wake up in the morning, look out the window, and there it is- a blanket of white everywhere! Untouched and beautiful! Everything looks clear and clean and new! That's what I envision when I think of God's forgiveness. Everything is covered in a blanket of beautiful and new life!
So, I plan to remind myself of this when I mess up. We get a new day to try again! We don't have to wait until the next New Year's Day to change things. Let's start today!
Blessings,
Jennifer

2019 Goals

Happy New Year! As I've been reflecting on the year behind me and the year ahead of me, I've been thinking about what changes I have made this past year and the changes I plan to make in the future. Each year, I pick a scripture verse and a word to focus on throughout the year. 2018 was "Out" (thinking outside the box, going outside of my comfort zone, going outside of the church to reach out to the community) My scripture verse was Matthew 28: 19-20 "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”As with each new year, I started with excitement and big plans. I feel like we should celebrate New Year's Day at least twice a year to remind us of our New Year thoughts. I think quarterly would be most helpful. So, while I did accomplish some things that I would consider part of this, I definitely could have done better. While I did reflect on my word more often than some years, another word seemed to be sticking in my mind a lot more. And so, as I thought of my word for this year, I was tempted to keep my word from last year- see if I could take it further this year. But, in the end, I decided my word for 2019 kind of made itself clear throughout 2018. "Intentional" Sometimes life gets so busy that things just go along. But, by being intentional with everything I do, I have purpose and don't cloud my life with "just being busy". I actually started working towards some of my 2019 goals awhile ago. One of them was to walk my dogs daily and use that time to also listen to my daily devotions and Bible study. I have to say, I feel very intentional in these things and, although it takes over an hour a day, I always feel it's time worth spending. While listening to 1 Corinthians the other day, I came across some verses that I knew would be perfect for my 2019 scripture. When I looked it up, I decided on the Message translation.  "You’ve all been to the stadium and seen the athletes race. Everyone runs; one wins. Run to win. All good athletes train hard. They do it for a gold medal that tarnishes and fades. You’re after one that’s gold eternally. I don’t know about you, but I’m running hard for the finish line. I’m giving it everything I’ve got. No sloppy living for me! I’m staying alert and in top condition. I’m not going to get caught napping, telling everyone else all about it and then missing out myself." 1 Corinthians 9:24- 27

It's time to give it everything I've got, be intentional, and accomplish my goals!As part of our youth annual New Year discussion, we choose goals in 4-6 categories. I'm still working on my thoughts for these.

My sister invited me to a facebook group called #4goals. It seems the focus is to have 4 categories and a daily goal for each one- or an overarching goal with daily work in each category. The group encourages something for self, something for others, something for humanity, and something else, although that is flexible depending on the person. Mine don;t quite match up to that, but, I do have daily goals in mind for now, at least. 1) As I mentioned, daily dog walking and devotion time which covers both health and spiritual growth is well on it's way to becoming a habit. 2) Following the schedule I set for daily tasks for work is the next one and covers both workdays and days off with intentional Sabbath days. 3) Changing my eating habits to help my overall health and well-being is definitely part of my intentional focus since until now, nothing about what I eat has been very intentional except for not eating foods that trigger my migraines. 4) And, last but not least, I plan to be more intentional with my time with family and friends. This goal is a work in progress that I hope continues to improve as I have realized more than ever the importance of it.

I should probably schedule to send this to myself at the beginning of each month. But, for now I will start with today.

Blessings,

Jennifer